A little more than a whimper and a sob.

Sorry, Peter. Sorry for calling so late and waking you up from your sleep. I felt so guilty and wanted you to go back to sleep, but you wouldn't. You wanted me to keep talking even though you were so tired. You listened while I spoke, and I spoke even though you were too tired to respond. I'm sorry that my phone cut me off mid-sentence and a few minutes after I called. I sent you a goodnight text, unsure if you received it or not. I wanted to call your room phone but I don't have credit and didn't want to use my home phone in case my parents listened on the other line. :(

I apologise from the depth of my heart. I feel so hurt that this all happened. I wanted to tell you that I'm getting healthier and that I've been drinking more water. I wanted to tell you about my day even though all I've done was the same usual things. I wanted to know how your day was, if you ate lunch and dinner, and what you did before I called. I wanted to know if you're nervous about tomorrow and if that lady returned your textbook. I'm sorry again for calling you late. I should've called when I wanted to. I always want to hear your voice. I missed you more today. I wish I could see you and to be in your arms again.....

Tomorrow I'm going to visit your house and go into your room. I'll tidy your room, take the bin out for you, wash your bed sheets and copy the photos from your camera to my laptop. I'll go to CPU and ask for the address you're staying at. I'll change my phone provider to Vodafone, because Virgin Mobile is a piece of shit and won't let me send MMS. I'll study more as promised.


Please forgive me, dear. I hope you have the loveliest first day tomorrow. Don't be nervous, you'll learn and understand more throughout the week. I hope the other student is nice and doesn't give you shit. Eat well and drink plenty of water. Stay healthy, I'll remember to call earlier tomorrow. I want to hear your voice so bad. No doubt, long distance is difficult. I'm actually listening to songs "long distance" related. It's making me miss you so much more. I know you told me to be strong while you're gone, but today feels like an exception. I miss you.